Sent: Fri, Jul 29, 2016 at 4:22 PM
Recipients: Daughter, Son, Daughter-in-Law
Email Body:
Well. It happened. Something else for my memoirs.
Previously, at the end of a particularly hectic week – just 2 weeks ago, I got a message that I was to report for jury duty in Superior Court. As instructed, I called yesterday to see if they had settled out of court. NO. So…I had to register promptly at 8:30am.
I signed in and sat in the uncomfortable benches. The judge talked with us informally to explain the procedures, and then things got underway with robes and apposing attorneys. I’m tired and want to go home.
So, they start asking questions of all of us: Do we know the defendant? NO.
Do we know the prosecutor? NO.
Do we know the attorney for the defendant? I hesitated. I don’t know him personally, never met, but he is representing my brother-in-law in a few matters. I say nothing.
Do we know the witness? Yes. How? He’s a client of mine. In what capacity? I’m a CPA. So you do his taxes? Yes.
OK. The randomly numbered system gets me in the first selection of 6 jurors. The judge (Who I know) talks to us. The attorneys address us. Then, they start asking questions. “I’m not done with you….” said the attorney to me. He asked me more questions if I can be fair. I seem a bit hesitant, but yes, I can be fair.
Time for strikes. I feel certain that the attorney will strike me.
They strike 3 jurors, but not me. They call 3 others and strike those 3. They call 3 more and strike those 3. I was starting to wonder where the bathroom is…we’re sitting in the jury box in much more comfortable chairs, but its 10:30 by now. The judge calls a recess for smoking and bathroom break. In the bathroom, one of the potential jurors says: “I can’t believe you’re still up there! They really don’t want to hear what I have to say”.
Based on the questions that they asked the dismissed jurors, I feel I must tell the bailiff about how I know the attorney. I also tell her that I’m afraid they might ask which relative has the same attorney and I don’t want to say in open court. I tell her.
When we all come back in, the judge asks the attorneys to meet him outside.
After a brief meeting, they return and the prosecutor says….”ma’am, I understand you know the attorney”. I state that he is defending a relative. Do you think you can be fair? Sure.
They turn in their strike papers again and I’m still in!
They dismiss one juror and I notice they bull pen is getting low. They call the lady who spoke to me in the ladies room. They ask if she has ever been in an accident. Not only was she in an accident 7 years ago, but she was still rather fired up about it and did not like the way the police handled it. Adamently.
They asked if we had ever been in a car that malfunctioned? My hand went up again…..Yes, my airbag went off when I was NOT in an accident”. That kind of threw them for a loop. Were you able to handle the vehicle safely? Yes.
Also…”Ma’am, it states on your form that you manage your CPA firm…would you be too distracted today to serve on this jury?” Not wanting to lie in open court, I couldn’t say ‘yes’ because it was my day off, our office is closed on Friday’s in the summer and the judge already told us the trial would be finished today. So…No.
Does anyone NOT want to be here? The lady from the bathroom stated that she really couldn’t focus because she was supposed to go on an outing with her grandkids today.
We have our jury.
What? Really? You kept me AND the other lady? Ok…
We break for lunch – pizza and breadsticks which worked out perfectly for me avoiding bread and sugar this week.
They explain that the case is a misdemeanor – reckless driving.
During opening statements, they give us a map of the site of the accident…its across the street from my house!
The witness, who is my client, showed us on the map where he pulled over to avoid getting hit – my brother’s driveway who lives next door to me!
I was just getting ready to give the bailiff the signal that I need a bathroom break from drinking 2 bottles of water when the prosecutor asks for a recess. Whew!
When we get in the jury room, I show them the picture, point out my house and my brothers house on the map and they asked “WHY are you still on this jury??” I really have no answer. The only witness is my client. It happened across the street. The attorney represents my brother-in-law. The witness used my brothers driveway for safety. My airbag went off and I managed the car safely. And, I’m starting to think that this kid was in my daughter’s class.
Its because I’m who I am and they know I need the full experience that life can throw at me.
I also let my fellow jurors know that a few weeks ago my daughter and I watched the OJ Simpson Trial, Making a Murder, and Hunting Ground, and that if you are famous or an athlete, you can do what you want, and you can’t get a fair trial in Wisconsin. So I know how to do this.
We hear testimony from the witness, the sheriff, and the kid.
We are dismissed for deliberation.
We all agreed that intent was absent, so Not Guilty on Count #1.
We had more discussion on Count #2 – I talked about the area in question and 2 of us offered that there were other alternatives than the route he took – he finally crashed in the yard across the street, totaled his car, but no one was hurt, and the owner of the property was not concerned about his yard.
However, based on the rules of engagement, we had to acquit. The glove didn’t fit.
So…we were done at 4pm, as the judge thought we would be.
We all agreed that it was an interesting experience and none of us would have lasted 2 days if we were sequestered.
Another life experience…evidently, I’m playing cover-all with my bingo card.
Notes: I responded with “This email is about as amazing as Beyonce Chicken.” Which is saying something, because it’s REALLY hard to beat Beyonce Chicken.
Emails From My Mother-in-Law 